Congrats, friend! You just completed the "What's Your Connection Type" quiz, and that means you're done waiting years for something that should take weeks. You're ready to feel playful, present, and like yourself again - not someday, but starting now.

Your Connection Type is: Running on Empty 

You love your life. You would just really like to have enough of yourself left to enjoy it. 

You are probably the person people count on because you have spent years giving everyone the wildly unreasonable impression that you can handle pretty much anything.

You remember the appointments, notice what everyone else misses, solve problems before they officially become problems, answer the texts, make the decisions, find the missing thing, and somehow know that you are almost out of toothpaste even though other perfectly capable adults also use the toothpaste.

You are good at handling things, and you probably like that about yourself.

Somewhere along the way, though, “She can handle it” quietly became “She can handle everything.”

The tricky part is that you can continue functioning beautifully long after you have stopped enjoying yourself. You can run the company, take care of people, keep the house functioning, get through another meeting, solve another problem, and appear perfectly fine while privately fantasizing about checking into a hotel where nobody knows your name.

Then you finally get into bed next to someone you genuinely love, and they reach for you because they have missed you.

Maybe they want to talk, maybe they want to cuddle, maybe they kiss your neck in a way that a previous version of you would have been VERY interested in exploring.

They are thinking, "Finally, I get you."

Meanwhile, you are thinking, "There is no me left. She will reopen tomorrow." 

Turns Out, This Isn't Just About Your Romantic Relationship...

you may start noticing it in places that have absolutely nothing to do with intimacy.

With your kids...you can love your kids more than anything and still hear your name for the 714th time that day and think, "What could anyone POSSIBLY need now?"

You may rush through a story you actually wanted to hear, say “not right now” more than you meant to, or find yourself half-listening while mentally working through everything that still needs to happen.

Then the house gets quiet and you think, "I wanted to enjoy them more today."

With your family...you may be the person everyone calls because you know what to do, remember what needs to happen, and somehow became the unofficial keeper of everyone else's life.

You love being there for your people. You just occasionally wish someone would call and say, “I handled everything. I was just checking on YOU.”

With your friends...You may genuinely miss your friends while simultaneously ignoring the group text for three days because answering it feels like one more thing.

You want the girls' dinner. You want the ridiculous conversation. You want the friend who makes you laugh until your stomach hurts.

Sometimes, though, even people you adore can feel like another place you are expected to show up when what you desperately need is somewhere you don't have to show up at all.

That is the part that matters.

You haven't stopped loving your people.

You just want enough of yourself left to actually enjoy them.

You may have been trying to start at the wrong end. 

When intimacy starts disappearing, most of us immediately focus on intimacy.

We need more date nights.
I should initiate more.
We need to spice things up.
Why am I never in the mood anymore?

Except sex isn't where your disconnect started, so sex isn't where I would start fixing it.

For Running on Empty, there is an order in which connection comes back:

CAPACITY (Have something left) 

Before you can genuinely connect with anyone else, there has to be enough of you available to participate. 

↓

WANTING (You start hearing yourself again)

You notice what you like, what you don't, what you want more of, and what you are absolutely done doing simply because everybody expects you to.

↓

CONNECTION (Connection stops feeling like another ask)

Closeness starts feeling like something you get to enjoy instead of something else you have to give. A conversation can just be a conversation. A hug can just feel good.

↓

PLAY + PLEASURE (Fun starts sneaking back in)

You laugh. You linger. You touch. You send the inappropriate text. You kiss because kissing sounds good, not because you are trying to check “work on intimacy” off your list.

↓

DESIRE (Actually has somewhere to land)

You are not forcing yourself to want sex. There is finally enough of you available to want it.

You’ve been trying to start at Step 5, so of course date nights, scheduling sex, buying lingerie, or telling yourself you should want it more haven’t created the connection you’re craving.

Sex was never the first thing that needed your attention.

For you, we start with capacity, because when there is enough of you available again, you can hear what you want. You can enjoy closeness. You can play. You can feel pleasure again.

That’s the process behind Reignite.